Although my fibroid removal surgery was 3 months ago, I’m still not over this:


I didn’t even know they were there. 


Sean suggested I see my doctor this summer; It had been a few years since my last visit. He’s constantly tending to his own health and chronic diseases, so I'm sure I seemed crazy for not seeing my doctor at least once a year. I rationalized I didn’t have any symptoms I was concerned about — just what I chalked up to normal aging. 


I didn’t see any reason to go... but I did it anyway. [This is why I love my husband.]


Walking into the clinic, I figured I’d get tips for hormone balancing, an annoying reminder that my fertility clock is ticking, and uncomfortable prodding and probing, as is tradition. As the PA palpated my abdomen, she stopped mid-sentence --

Oh! You have fibroids.

It could have just as easily been Oh, I love your outfit.

She calmly answered my rapid-fire questions. I wracked my brain for anything I could remember from friends’ experiences with fibroids. 


I walked out of the appointment, sat in my car and cried.


The rest (which I shared in this post and this post) all happened fast and slow at the same time... and now here I sit in January 2024, fibroidless with a scar-tissued, in-tact uterus... feeling more and more like myself every day.


If I had to put my finger on it, the feeling I have — still to this day — is not guilt. It’s not shame or sadness. It’s... shock. And awe, at how growths the size of a grapefruit, two plums and quarter were all living happily, filling up my entire pelvic bowl while I went about my life. 


As my surgeon at Mayo Clinic told me on our first consultation, “Mollie, no 37-year old woman should be waking up in the middle of every night to pee.”

What a metaphor, huh?


So often, we don’t consider taking care of ourselves until we’re sick. Our body (and our doctor) demands our attention, and finally we yield. We start taking supplements and lifting weights. We go back to yoga class. We take the course. We start cooking at home again. We drink less (or give it up entirely). 


When life demands it, we listen. But what about when she whispers to us? 


There were plenty of hints my body gave along the way — including the very typical, yet not-talked-about symptom of someone with a 10cm uterine fibroid: Looking in the mirror and swearing to myself that either I’m the vessel of immaculate conception (it's impossible for Sean and I to conceive naturally), or despite my incredibly active lifestyle, I somehow got really chubby. 


None of it made sense — and looking back, none of it made me feel very good. My body was whispering for my attention, making my life harder... and I either I couldn’t hear her, wasn’t listening, or — what I suspect — is that I didn’t speak her language at the time. 
​

Call the last six months my Rosetta Stone, because I definitely speak my body’s language now!

As I consider all my most life-changing moments over the last decade, it’s been a consistent spiritual practice alongside movement that brings me back to myself. I fall away from myself, and yoga brings me back. I make a discovery like I did this summer, and yoga brought me back. I'm so grateful to have the tools and techniques I do to move through this — and every — obstacle that comes my way.


I’m determined to make 2024 (and beyond) a life of attentiveness and assertiveness when my body whispers. Better yet, I aim to anticipate her whispers before they happen, and choose routine maintenance over ignoring my one-and-only absolutely perfect skin sack.



As a stranger, hobbling with a cane said to me as she walked through a door I held for her at the post office last week, “Enjoy your youth!” 


I smiled and assured her I would. And I will!


Wherever you are, no matter the condition of your skin sack, please know that you are worth the investment your heart is begging you to make in your health and your happiness. We only get this one life. Live it, baby!


Sending love,
Mollie

As I walked into the Nordic Spa in Girdwood, Alaska on Sunday, I realized I’d never done a "spa day" with the intention of staying the entire day.

The SMELL of the place is enough to relax me — let alone the fact that an in-person yoga class was in my near future (omg)... followed by a plethora of saunas, steam baths, hot tea, cold plunges, hot tubs and more. 


I walked into the yoga studio, pulled my mat out of its bag, rolled it out... and froze.


I self-consciously looked side-to-side to see if anyone else was seeing the situation: My bright yellow yoga mat, covered in dirty smudges and paw prints. Evidence of a dog-loving yogi’s life well-lived... and, my ego (mortified) thought to herself: Sooooo out-of-place here!


I snagged a bottle of essential-oil infused cleaner, and furiously scrubbed my mat for (likely) the first time in its life. After many minutes of attempted dirt removal, I sat back, surveyed the lack of progress, and gave up. The smudges weren’t going anywhere until a washing machine was involved. 


This is me, I thought. Sunny vibes, dirt smudged, and ready to roll.


As soon as my teacher walked into the space, all shame for my mat’s appearance evaporated. I gave Andie a big hug and had another realization: It’s been many *many* years since I’ve had the honor of taking a class away from home from one of my students! 

Andie is grounded and charismatic — and always makes everyone feel at home wherever she goes. She was a student of SHEWild YTT with me in the arctic two years ago, and today, she teaches yoga (and practices massage) around Girdwood, Alaska, including Sunday mornings at 10am where I found myself this past weekend. 


As she cued up some tunes and offered props around the room, I watched in awe. Every single person in the room felt seen and heard as they voiced nerves about doing yoga after a long hiatus, or felt sore from a few days of skiing at Alyeska. Andie smiled and nodded, reassuring each student they were right where they needed to be — and the entire class could be modified to suit their needs. Dirt smudges or no, all were welcome in that room.

And then she taught KRIYA! 

It’s one thing for me to take a yoga class in-person — but it’s a treat to take a class in-person that’s taught in the style I love the most! My soul was singing with every CHHHH of Prana Shakti and CHH-CHHH of Shiva Kriya (IYKYK). My immune system sung during Lama Pranayama, and my aching body relished the asana flow in the middle.


Savasana was — literally — magic. 


By the final bow at the end of class, I knew I’d been given a gift. The gift, and the certain glow, that I’ve found only kriya yoga can give me:

Thank you, Andie <3 

Sending love,
​Mollie

Jyeshta means “Elder Sister,” and this division of the zodiac can swing in one direction, or abruptly the other. It’s ruled by Mercury, who gives a dual nature (twins) to everything he’s involved with.

Jyeshta is also known as Alakshmi — the goddess of Bad Luck.

But! All hope is not lost on this New Moon. We’re just called to have a deeper understanding of the teachings. Nothing should ever be taken literally... hopefully we’ve learned this by now! The archetype of the “older sister” is esteemed, and connected to our destiny. Consider your older sister — or, if you don’t have one, consider older women who you consider sisterly. They guide us throughout life, and lend an understanding ear when we need advice.

So then, to approach this Goddess of Bad Luck, it’s simple: We need to redefine what bad luck is. We cannot allow our mind to run away with our thoughts... when we do, we fuel a downward spiral of negative thoughts that ultimately beget unconscious actions we may regret. Mercury Retrograde is on deck for Wednesday... so the potential to misunderstand others, or our ego-self is high.

When we truly understand Alakshmi, or Jyeshta Devi, we can see that WE are the creator of our own misfortune. Mercury doesn’t make you a bad communicator. Jyeshta doesn’t make your mind crazy.

The common denominator is... you.

As the wise Taylor Swift once said, “It’s me. Hi. I’m the problem it’s me.” 🙋🏼‍♀️

Yoga and meditation during times like this are crucial to wellbeing. The symbol of Jyeshta is the Deer — so think of shedding antlers and growing new ones. Yoga helps us learn to control our senses (and our mind) which are required in order to evolve, shed our skin, and transform. If we don’t have practices to work with, we feel frantic and uncertain — like a deer darting one way or the other.

Here’s some “elder sister” advice for today: You *already know* what helps your mind survive troubled waters. If you’ve been slacking in that realm, there’s no better time than the present to get back on track. Inner agility and discernment are available to you if you stick to what helps you ground and grow.

You’ve got this! 
Sending love, Mollie

When I first tried yoga in 2009, I was a clean slate. I knew nothing about it.


I was trying fitness classes at my new gym, and I saw “Forrest Yoga” on the schedule. The magazine-editor-in-me noticed they misspelled forest, and wondered: Maybe it’s all about looking like trees and tuning in with nature?


I chuckled years later when I found out that “Forrest Yoga” is a style founded by a woman named Ana Forrest. 


I was the same way getting into Vedic Astrology. Sure I’d read my horoscope like every teenage girl... but I couldn’t list all the signs, nor could I tell you (with confidence) the order of the planets or anything about them.


And yet, here I am. Once I answered my calling to dive in, there was no turning back. Immersing in the archetypal wisdom of the cosmos is part of my yogic path. I’m here for it — and I completely respect that not everyone else is.


I’ve since discovered that some people insist astrology is anti-god, wonder if it’s against religion, or assume it’s on the same level as fortune-telling... all of which Vedic Astrology is not.


So, I set out to discover why we think astrology is weird.


*Note: I researched astrology’s reputation in the USA. Vedic Astrology is, and has been practiced in India for thousands of years.*

I learned that our ingrained assumptions in the west run deep.


There have been so many individuals over the past 2,000 years who have worked hard to uphold astrology’s place as a respectable method for organizing our place in the cosmos — from theologians like Italian priest Thomas Aquinas, to business tycoons like JP Morgan, and famous astrologers like Evangeline Adams:

Fun fact: In 1914, astrologers in the state of New York like Evangeline Adams were arrested for practicing astrology. She felt so strongly that what she was doing was not fortune telling, that she went to trial and won-over the judge, and thus, successfully overturned the ruling for good.


Evangeline gave astrology a mainstream respect it hadn’t had in a loooong time. She went on to lead one of the most prolific astrology practices in history with an office in Carnegie Hall, serving many high profile clients, stirring up curiosity and devotion to planetary influence during a time where uncertainty reigned. 


The debate about whether astrology is “moral” and “just” has been happening for a long time. And from my view, it distills down to one crucial misunderstanding. Here's the truth: 


Astrology is NOT predicting the future. 


Although there have certainly been those who’ve tried, succeeded, and duped their clients, any decent astrologer will tell you that nothing in life, a reading, or in the cosmos is certain. 


Sure, we can predict when the eclipses will happen, and the transits of the planets, etc. But when it comes to how those heavenly bodies influence life on Earth, the interpretation is largely influenced by the lineage of the astrologer, and the client. It’s all about archetypes, stories, symbols and learning to go with the flow of life. 


I laugh, thinking if I’d had my birth chart read by a Vedic Astrologer even 15 years ago... Teaching yoga, living in the arctic, and studying Vedic astrology and reading people charts? 


C’mon. 


No one could've guessed that was my future! (Pun intended.)


All this to say, I hope today’s story can break up some cellular memory of the many many many years where astrology was weird, because it’s not. It’s just another way of explaining why we’re here — which resonates for some and not for others.

In light,
Mollie

Here's the story I promised you yesterday... it's a good one!


Brahma had Saraswati. Vishnu had Lakshmi. But in the ancient stories of India, Shiva was a bachelor for the longest period of time.


And it wasn’t about needing man and woman in a marriage like we'd consider today. Gods like Brahma, Vishnu and Shiva literally could not act in the world without their shakti counterparts. The divine masculine (gods) represent dynamic stillness, where the divine feminine (goddesses) represent movement. 


Both are required to play the game of life.


So as a single guy, hanging out high in his mountain abode, Shiva would go into meditation and forget to do his job: Destruction. 


And while that sounds nice, it goes against the laws of nature. Without destruction, Brahma cannot create, and Vishnu cannot sustain. Everything that is created must eventually be destroyed. This is reflected in everything we see and do.


So Brahma and Vishnu go to Shakti for help so that there can be destruction again. Shakti obliges, and comes into the world as the goddess Sati, one of the many daughters of Daksha Prajapati. She is the one who successfully rouses Shiva out of his meditation and the pair falls in love and — in accordance with the plan — destruction begins once again.


Unfortunately, Daksha has no respect for Shiva. What father does at the beginning, anyway? Rather than seeing Shiva as a “dutiful son-in-law”, he sees him as the “bad boy”. He’s up in the mountains, surrounded by unruly creatures like snakes, and Daksha doesn’t think Shiva is good enough for his sweet daughter.


So Daksha holds a huge ceremony, and invites everyone in the realm EXCEPT Shiva and Sati. This is a huge insult for the pair — and Sati tells Shiva that she wants to go anyway. Maybe it was an oversight of some kind. 


Shiva responds definitively: No, I don’t want you to go. And he puts his foot down. 


This is the part where I can imagine the feeling of what happens next... because I feel the same way sometimes when people tell me what to do:


Sati explodes in 10 directions! 


In each of the directions that Shiva looks, there is a form of the goddess that came from Sati. And not a sweet, demure goddesses... he is shocked to see ten ferocious forms of the goddess, and can’t believe they sprung from his sweet wife. 


The goddess Kali looks at him and says:


How dare you tell me what to do. Look around you. There is nowhere that I am not. I am all of creation. Including you. You are part of me. 


This performance deserves a fist pump, no?

That fire is inside each and every one of us — woman or not. That fire is the fuel needed for action and impact. And although this is just one origin story of the Dasha Maha Vidyas, they are always depicted in the tantric teachings as the 10 aspects of shadow and light within us.


It’s been so fun writing this story — and including that example from my own life where I felt like Sati, exploding in 10 directions!


Thus, I’m excited to announce (drumroll, please!) that from January through June 2024, I’m teaching a brand new course called the SHAKTI KRIYA TRAINING, live on Zoom, all about the Dasha Maha Vidyas. 

Click here for all the details. ​

This course is one component of my SHEJourney 300-Hour Teacher Training... and I’m excited to announce that these 11 sessions, the powerful content and practices within, AND initiation into 30 new Kriyas and pranayamas will now be offered as a Continuing Education Course, OR as a part of the 300-hour with me.


Whether you intend to count this investment toward the 300-hour SHEJourney training with me in the future, OR you simply want 50 CEUs to satisfy the Yoga Alliance requirement every 3 years, this training might be exactly what you’re looking for...


And... if you've been considering taking my Cosmic Kriya Training course online, you can save $333 if you bundle it with Shakti Kriya before December 1st! Simply register for the Shakti Kriya Training, shoot me an email with your intention, and I'll charge your card on file for $316 — that's $333 off the original price of $649. Both of these courses can be counted toward future participation in the 300-hour training.



Note: A 200-hour YTT with Yoga Hive, or my Himalayan Kriya Teacher Training are prerequisites to take these courses. If you have questions about this, please don’t hesitate to reply and reach out!


Wishing you all a happy few weeks as we descend into the Winter Solstice!

In light and shadow,
Mollie

After living my entire life within Wisconsin, I met Sean in 2010 and moved west after 4 months dating long distance. Soon after my arrival in Utah, I was on the hunt for a job.


I’d left what I thought was my dream job: The style editor at a regional women’s magazine. I had a lot of energy, some great communications skills, and a desire to make an impact.


The marketing job I found was great at first glance... but within a month, I knew it was never going to last.

This is an old (low resolution) photo in front of my office after getting the job. Naively stoked about being the Assistant Director of Communications and Marketing!

My boss gave unreasonable criticism of my ideas, she chastised the way I decorated my office, and yelled at me when I made mistakes. As a gal recently plucked from her "midwest nice" roots, it was all too much. I learned the company was the sort of place you put your head down, do mediocre work, and get a paycheck.


I could have suffered through... but that’s not my style.


With Sean’s support, I quit the gig and start tutoring students at a college prep boarding school. I made my own schedule, sent my own invoices, and loved working with high schoolers. 


I’d spend my off-hours working on a new project called Riding On Insulin. Sean and I would host ski/snowboard camps for kids with type 1 diabetes and we offered our first sold out program in Park City, Utah in December 2010 — and that day, I knew I was on the precipice of something big. I wasn’t going to be a tutor forever, and this new venture would ensure I’d be making an impact in the world every single day for kids with type 1 diabetes. 


I distinctly remember telling a friend that I wanted to make Riding On Insulin an official nonprofit and get to the point where the organization could pay me to work full time.


“You know that’ll never work, right?”


Their response will stick with me to the end of my days. 

Within 2 years, I brought on a board of directors of 8+ individuals from around the country, made the necessary connections to raise the money for our anticipated annual budget, and was officially hired to run Riding On Insulin as the Executive Director(!).


I hired an employee, followed by a few more years later, and we secured the best health insurance for our team. I served in that role for 7 years, and still serve as the Director of Operations today. 


Since Riding On Insulin’s inception, I’ve raised over $5.3 million to support these action sports camps for kids, teens, and adults with T1D, and the organization has served nearly 5,000 individuals around the world.


It’s amazing what’s possible when we put our minds to something, isn’t it? Even if those around us think we’re crazy.


The circumstances as a woman in today’s world seem to be improving, but the cultural expectations surrounding ambition, career and what we “should” or “shouldn’t do” still bind us — if we let them.


The wildness inside of each of us has been itching to burst out and make itself known for millennia.


In the Tantric lineages of yoga (such as the Kriya yoga I teach), this wildness of the feminine is the entire premise of the Dasha Maha Vidyas, the 10 Great Wisdom Goddesses who reflect both the light and shadow within each of us. 
I’m going to tell you their origin story that really resonates with me, and my personal experience... 


Stay tuned, and I'll see you in your inbox tomorrow for Part 2!


In light,
Mollie

The Nakshatra (star cluster) where yesterday’s New Moon sits is called Vishakha — which, like all things, has a light and a shadow. On one side, Vishakha can mean “to enter the heavens.” On the flipside, Vishakha can represent “the manifestation of poison.” Not literal poison — consider “poison” like the drama of life. The grudges, heavy emotions, and suffering we carry.


Imagine that between these two opposing forces stands an archway… 🌈 one where we can get a glimpse of heaven on Earth, and where we can choose to enter the threshold on our spiritual path. If we walk through that archway of wisdom, we can leave behind our burdens and understand how to heal ourselves — and know ourselves — from the inside out. Vishakha represents a distinct opportunity to move in this direction.


Vishakha is ruled by Jupiter — the planet of expansion, gifts and great wisdom. Wherever Jupiter goes, he helps his students (if they’re listening!) see how to release their grip on “material gains” and focus on spiritual gains as a more sustainable and fulfilling way to live.


In my own life, I’ve been contemplating the battles I fight in my mind — the ways I think I should or shouldn’t be, the things I should or shouldn’t do. Who am I trying to appease? Am I trying to impress the voice in my head, aka- my ego-personality? Usually if I have to ask myself this question, my ego is involved 😝 My true self doesn’t require validation.


In those scenarios, I visualized her (yes, my ego has an entire persona!) leaving my body, and I mentally place her somewhere at a distance from where I am… perhaps on the opposing side of Vishakha’s archway. It’s as if she’s kicked out of my “office” and into the waiting room. She sits there, acknowledged but placated. Sometimes she sneaks back into my mind, but I calmly usher her back out to the waiting room so my true self can continue walking my path in ease.


Is there something you’re able to leave behind at the threshold of this season of life? Perhaps your ego, your stories, or another burden you’ve been carrying? Offer it up. See what happens when you let go, and walk through 🥰


Sending love!
—Mollie